Week 10 EOC: Lawyer Jokes

A man and a woman were conversing at a party. The woman said: "Lawyers are jerks." The man responded: "I take offense to that remark." "Why," said the woman. "Are you a lawyer?" "No," he responded: "I'm a jerk."

Where does a vampire learn how to suck blood? During his first year of Law School.

It was so cold last winter that I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.

Two alligators are sitting on the edge of a swamp. The small one turns to the big one and says, "I don't understand how you can be so much bigger than I am. We're the same age, we were the same size as kids... I just don't get it. 

"Well," says the big alligator, "what have you been eating?" 
Alligator "Lawyers, same as you," replies the small alligator. 

"Hmm. Well, where do you catch 'em?" 

"Down at that law firm on the edge of the swamp." 

"Same here. Hmm. How do you catch 'em?" 
"Well, I crawl under a BMW and wait for someone to unlock the door. Then I jump out, bite 'em, shake the crap out of 'em, and eat 'em!" 

"Ah!" says the big alligator, "I think I see your problem. See, by the time you get done shakin' the crap out of a lawyer, there's nothing left but lips and a briefcase..."

Week 9 EOC: Wall Street Journal Opinion

The argument will always lead to one big factor when dealing with the somewhat legalization of marijuana. Under the constitution congress can’t pass laws that apply in some states and not others. So at this point it seems like if you were to get caught with a bag of weed you would notice the same process as you normally would. Only to find out when you show up for court the judge will just dismiss your case or at least treat it in a much easier manner. The reason it has taken so long for Obama to come through with this type of decision is because of the politics it deals with. No senator or just about anyone for that matter wants to bring up marijuana legalization. There are a lot of people out there that look down upon people that use any sort of drug, marijuana is one of them definitely. “Not since Nixon have we seen a Presidency so disdainful of the law” (Source) . Pretty soon our fellow Americans are going to treat any law they don’t like something they shouldn’t have to follow, and blame Obama for their actions. “Anyone waiting to legally buy recreational marijuana in Washington will have to wait about nine months longer” (Source). This goes to show just how much time they are investigating on how much they should tax for marijuana use. “ In the end, state laws legalizing marijuana could topple a huge federal beast the war on drugs- while the gun nullification bills are show but impotent”. This is one of the reasons why I don’t think it was passed in many other states. If it were to happen that way, it actually would be a huge disaster in my opinion.(Source)

Your Own Arguments and Opinions

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Rule of Law

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Reasoning of the Law

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The Questions

1.) Does my church have to pay if the choir sings "Spirit In The Sky"?

2.) Does Weird Al Yankovic need permission to do his parodies?

3.) What royalties do you have to pay for backing tracks (karaoke versions)?

4.) Is audio on surveillance legal?

5.) Is it legal to audio record doctor visits in a state with a one person consent law when it comes to audio recording? (doesn't apply to Nevada)

6.) My band wants to record "Hotel California" can we?

7.) Is secretly recording to prove harassment illegal?

8.) When does copyright start? Do I have to register the work with the government?

Early off one of the questions I asked him was, my band wants to record “Hotel California” can we? In which Thomas responded, “From what I believe songs are copyrighted for the time the author is alive and a bit after”. “Today, A copyright is valid until 70 years after the death of the works last living author or, in the case of works owned by a corporation, the copyright lasts 95 years from publication or 120 years from creation, whichever is shorter” (p. 507). One question that really started to get him talking is, “Is it legal to audio record visits in a state with a one person consent law when it comes to audio recording”? After talking with him I now know that the Federal Government makes all doctor files private, so in the end you simply cannot record audio when you are at a doctor’s office without their consent. One of the last of the questions really got his attention, “Is secretly recording to prove harassment illegal?” If the person didn't know they were being recorded then you generally can’t use it as evidence in court. He did mention a scenario with sexual harassment and how it might be an exception that would get pushed by the defendant in a law suite.

Legal Authority

“We depend upon laws for safe communities, functioning economies, and personal liberties. An easy way to gauge the importance of law is to glance through any newspaper and read about nations that lack a strong system of justice. Notice that these countries cannot ensure physical safety and personal liberties. They also fail to offer economic opportunity for most citizens. We may not always like the way our legal system works, but we depend on it to keep our society functioning.” (p. 4)

             I was able to take the time to sit down and talk with Attorney Thomas McGrath who has been in the industry for quite some time now.  He graduated from UC Berkeley with a Bachelor of Arts in English in 1987, and later was awarded his Juris Doctor at UC Hastings College of Law in 1992. He works as the Regional Managing Attorney for American Family Insurance Company at the moment, this was a promotion he had just received.

At first he wasn't completely sure he would be best suited to answer my audio related questions and suggested I contacted his brother which is a Patent Attorney for Microsoft. Given Thomas is my mother’s Fiancee I decided to see if I could get some good information from him first. The whole process took me about thirty minutes which was a little longer than I expected but he was really able to answer my questions in a quick and understandable way.

They are right when they say attorneys like to talk a lot because he didn't want to seem to stop. One subject would somewhat steer off into another which actually made it very interesting. I felt the questions I had to ask relating to audio were actually quite significant and made him ponder a few different situations that could and have actually happened, making him come to a maybe conclusion to a few of my questions which was interesting. It seemed like he took the same approach as the book uses for the questions I asked, turning them into various law suits.